Thursday, February 17, 2011
General Insanity; News of the Weird; Legislative Batshit; More….
Seems that the states’ legislators have the corner on batshit this week, what with South Dakota’s proposed legislation making the killing of physicians ‘justifiable’; a move by a Georgia Republican to ban driver’s licenses; Oklahoma’s attempt to make Creationism the only valid ‘scientifically approved’ philosophy of the universe, and (finally!) Montana’s attempt to declare global warming ‘beneficial’.
(I remember a skit from the sketch-comedy ‘Laugh-In ‘ many years ago, where a faux Richard Nixon declared that we were going to blow up the sun. Most of this proposed legislation sounds just about as insane. )
News of the Weird
There’s always someone willing to make a buck – souvenir condoms are being rolled out (so to speak) in honor of the upcoming Royal Wedding in Great Britain; you can buy your very own Jesus Sandals ($7; the pair); a driver’s dog here in my home state of Oregon actually helped a state trooper make a drug-bust - speaking of dogs, there’s a casino in Atlantic City which aims to become the first dog-friendly casino in the nation (no word on whether they’ll be allowed to play poker under a velvet painting of same, or not) – and finally, there’s a guy who’s made a clock which operates on dead flies, which said mechanism catches and 'digests' all by itself. (I’m not kidding. The damn thing lives on dead flies.)
For Dumbass Quotes of the Week, you can go here to read Dan Quayle’s little boy, Ben, step into his father’s shoes and wax-eloquent over Reagan’s jellybeans; here to read Sarah Palin’s missive on the Egyptian revolution, or here to read Ellis Washington’s disjointed, batshit rant about “the progressive-Muslim axis” (not one word of which is even sane.)
The Ark Encounter theme park has left an important Biblical critter out of the Ark (no word on whether this guy is going to help 'consult' by way of Biblical correction); here are some batshit-insane Scientology facts (in case you ever needed them); a Tea Party leader at the recent CPAC conference said that she ‘doesn’t want to speak Chinese’ (hey - clears that up for me); the city council of Fort Wayne, Indiana wants to name a municipal building after a man named Harry Baals (somehow; I don’t think that’s gonna fly); Mike Huckabee says if he runs for President again, it’ll be to end abortion (guess things like fixing the economy and putting people back to work aren’t good enough reasons) -- and lastly, Glenn Beck and Bill O’Reilly get together on O’Reilly’s show for what my Grandfather would have called “Midnight at a butt-f*cker’s Reunion”.
Finally, the winner of Astra’s Batshit of the Week Award (and proof that bugfuckery abounds, even in the highest levels of the American military) goes to retired Army general Jerry Boykin, the Army's Head Fundie for years until his recent retirement -- he stated this week that he’s uncovered a secret plot by President Obama to ‘take over America using the health care bill.’
Epic. Friggin’. Fail.: